This passage can ignite some controversy in our tolerant world view. How dare anyone expect one partner in the marriage be submissive to the other.
This is where the world stops paying attention. The Christian community goes on and reads the rest how the husband should love his wife as Christ loves the church.
The problem is that marriage has no more success within the Christian view as it has in the world view. Christian marriages fail just as often as non-Christian marriages, both failing at an alarming 50% and growing.
Why do Christian marriages fail when these couples should know God’s truth for a successful marriage?I'd like to blame it on the wives not being submissive. However as the leader in the home, I think the buck stops with the us guys. We are called to love our wives as Christ loves the church. So what exactly does this mean?
To find the answer we have to ask, how does Christ love the church?
Christ sacrificed for us.
Christ died for us.
Christ loves us in spite of our faults.
What does this mean in me?
First, I should always seek God’s will for each and every decision that has an impact on my wife and my family. Which decisions don’t?
I need to show my wife love, honor, and affection everyday even when I am tired and don’t feel like it (sacrifice). I need to put her needs ahead of my own, praying for her and her needs without ceasing (die to self). I need to never react defensively or selfishly based on how I perceive her actions or emotions (love her in spite of all).
As the husband, I am the spiritual leader of our home. As the spiritual leader, I need to be the one to lead the way living out Ephesians 5. God has blessed me with a beautiful, charming, intelligent, and Spirit filled wife. Loving her, honoring her and lifting her up should be my passion, not a just a rule I try to keep.